Jesus > Religion ?

January 13th, 2012

I have some problems with a video that has been popping up on my facebook for the past several days. In the video, a young man is reciting a poem he has written comparing Jesus to Religion. Feel free to look it up on youtube if you haven’t seen it. The title of the video is “Why I Hate Religion, But Love Jesus”. First, I believe that the heart of the person who posted this video is in the right place, and that his intentions are good. However, I think his presentation could leave others with the wrong impression.

He starts out saying that Jesus came to abolish religion. That simply isn’t true. Jesus told us why he came in Luke 19:10: “For the Son of man is come to seek and to save that which was lost.” It is also important to note that in Matthew 5:17 he said, “Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.” So what does the person in this video mean when he says that Jesus came to abolish religion?

Here is where I think a point of confusion comes in. Words mean things. The word ‘religion’ means different things to different people. Religion to some means ‘hypocritical, judgmental, rules-based moralism’. But that isn’t what it means to everybody.

Religion, according to Dictionary.com, is defined as:

1. a set of beliefs concerning the cause, nature, and purpose of the universe, especially when considered as the creation of a superhuman agency or agencies, usually involving devotional and ritual observances, and often containing a moral code governing the conduct of human affairs.

2. a specific fundamental set of beliefs and practices generally agreed upon by a number of persons or sects: e.g., the Christian religion;

I have a relationship with Jesus Christ. And I also have a religion. That religion is called Christianity. These statements are not contradictory, nor do they have to be.

The person in the video spends a great deal of time speaking out against religion. Certainly, empty hypocritical religion that tries to replace God’s grace with man’s works should be spoken out against. But to lump all of these acts into one big pile and call it ‘religion’ I think not only simplifies the problem, but completely misses the point.

I find this post-modern view of many in the church as being antagonistic to the concept of ‘religion’ very confusing. One of the bon mots that gets thrown out in our modern worship is, “I don’t have a religion — I have a relationship.” Yes, I understand what is being said here. We don’t have an empty, ritualistic formalism that must be carefully observed, but rather we have a close personal relationship with our redeemer. But to outsiders, I fear that it looks like we are living in denial or mincing words.

This concept of “Jesus or Religion” is a false dilemma. Nothing is wrong with the concept of ‘religion’. The earthly parents of Jesus were religious, in that they followed the law by presenting Jesus at the temple and observing the Passover by traveling to Jerusalem at the appointed time. Jesus did not come to speak out against religion, but rather the false traditions and abuse of true religion during His day. Jesus was also religious in that he was baptized, observed the Passover, etc.

The man in the video says, “Religion says ‘Do’, and Jesus says ‘Done’”. Again, I know he is talking about works versus the free gift of God’s grace. But Jesus said ‘Do’, too. He gave us the great commission. He gave us specific duties that we are to follow. Ephesians 2:10 says “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.” We are to perform these good works not out of a sense of resentful obligation or guilt, but rather because we love Jesus Christ and want to share his love with the world.

In conclusion, the gentleman in the video says things like “Jesus and Religion are on opposite spectrums, One’s the work of God, and one’s a man-made invention, one is the cure, but the other’s the infection,” and, “Religion, I hate it, in fact I literally resent it.” If the religion he is referencing is Christianity, then I have major problems with that statement. In fact, the very thought of combining all of these negative attributes about empty worship and calling it ‘religion’ is a hasty generalization. Later in the video, he even says, “Relgion is man searching for God, and Christianity is God searching for man.” Notice he didn’t say, “Jesus is God searching for man.” In fact, if the video was comparing Christianity with Religion, I wouldn’t have as much of a problem with it, although I still think that the unsaved would be confused with why we are comparing Christianity (a religion), with the concept of Religion.

How about “Christianity > False Religion”?  That is a message that I can support.

Snack Review: Herr’s Snack Friez Cheesy Bacon Ranch

June 20th, 2011

Sometimes, when I am on a long road trip, I get tired of the typical fast food menu. That is when I usually decide to “mini-mart it” for dinner. Yes, I have been known to eat chips for dinner. That doesn’t sound very appetizing, and I’m not going to try to convince anyone reading this that this is a good idea, or a healthy idea. But sometimes, chips just sound good — simple as that.

So, driving through Ohio on my way back to Indiana, I pulled into a convenience store and perused the snack aisles in search of dinner.

I wandered up and down the chip aisle, and nothing was calling out to me. I was in the mood for something new, but I was coming up short. Then I made my way to the end cap and noticed a display of Herr’s Snack Friez. Jackpot! And even better, there was a NEW flavor. I’m a sucker for new snacks, because I am always searching for the next great snack that nobody knows about. So I picked up a bag of Cheesy Bacon Ranch Snack Friez, paid for it (boy, did I ever), and left.

A picture of a bag of Herr's Snack Friez - Cheesy Bacon Ranch flavor

Beware! BEWARE!

I opened the bag and examined the contents. I am sad to say that, in my opinion, the contents stank. I can describe it as a strong, smoky odor that was not pleasant. This did not bode well.

Cautiously, I took a bite of a fry (frie?). I was assaulted mainly by the overwhelming flavor of SALT. Salty, salty, salty. I quickly guzzled some Coke Zero to get the taste out of my mouth. Against my better judgment, I tried another, and I discovered that it was not as salty. It appears that the coating of “flavor dust” was very uneven from frie to frie. The less flavored were not as bad, but the aggressively flavored friez were terrible. Even the lightly flavored friez were still greasy and unappetizing. The bacon flavor was mild and too smoky. The cheese was too salty, and the ranch flavor was just a different kind of salty.

Overall, this snack is pretty bad, especially compared to the other brands of oven-baked fries that I have tried in the past.

I give this snack a rating of 2.0 out of 10.0. Do not try it under any circumstances, unless you happen to love the flavor of salty smoke, or smoky salt.

25 years ago in Hill Valley…

October 27th, 2010

Back to the Future Logo

Cue Huey Lewis & the News

…on October 27th (hey, that’s today!), Marty McFly returned from 1885 to finally stop roaming through time with his eccentric friend, Dr. Emmett Brown.  Not only had he been 100 years into the past, but he also ventured 30 years into the past, and even 30 years into the future. I can’t help but suspect that the rest of his life was somewhat of a let-down by comparison.

I have always enjoyed the Back to the Future movies. Well, to be honest, that statement isn’t entirely true. While the first movie is full of time travel and stuff like that, I’ve never been a huge fan of it. More than anything, it is a period piece, made even worse by the fact that it takes place during the 1950′s, a time period that holds very little interest to me.

Back to the Future II, however, is a different story. I really enjoyed this movie when it came out. It was the FUTURE. I was fully convinced that hover boards were real, and self-drying jackets were just around the corner. And flying cars? A foregone conclusion. This movie had it all as far as I was concerned.

Back to the Future III. Not bad. I remember being shocked in the theater when I saw that there was going to be a sequel so soon after Back to the Future II. The movie is essential in tying the trilogy together, so I respect it for that.  But, again, it is more or less a period piece set in the Old West, and as little as I care for the 1950′s, I care for the Old West even less. Still, I found myself screaming at the screen during certain scenes, which means that I cared enough about the characters to get involved. That counts for something.

A few general complaints: in my opinion, the movies are successful in spite of Biff, Griff, and Mad Dog Tannen, not because of them. Just an over-the-top actor, though to be fair perhaps that is what the director was looking for. It’s just always annoyed me. Another thing is the ridiculously strong family resemblance in the McFly and Tannen families throughout 130 years of history. These people are almost identical to their ancestors. I understand why they are doing it, but in a movie that hinges on pure science fiction, it is the physical resemblance of McFly brood that takes me out of the movie due to it being too unrealistic.  The end of the last movie is also a little annoying. How did Doc Brown build that crazy time train? The only future tech he had in the past was the hover board. Could that possibly have been enough? A little too deus ex machina for me. Another thing: why is it that Marty McFly can’t stand to be called a coward or a chicken? Again, I understand that that is really the only character arc that he travels, and results in the only limited growth that we see in his character, but…enough is enough! They beat you over the head with it in the last two movies. Lastly, Lea Thompson and Mary Steenburgen.  No thank you. I don’t see what Marty and Doc see in those two.

Do the movies hold up? Yes. Sure, the effects are a little silly looking, although the interactions between the same actor playing multiple characters still looks impressive. But the story is still strong, and that is probably the most important thing. You could watch a lot worse movies than the Back to the Future trilogy.

This October has 5 Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays. So what?

October 25th, 2010
October is not special

Sorry, October. You are not that rare.

The Facebook statuses of my friends have been bombarded with the following words of wisdom for the past few weeks:

“everyone, I’m not super superstitious, but this year October has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens once every 823 years.This is money bags. So Copy this to your status and money will arrive within 4 days. Based on Chinese Feng Shui. The one who does not copy, will be without money. I cannot let that person be me…Copy within 11minutes….”

The sheer amount of incorrect statements in this “status” boggles the mind, so let’s take them individually.

1. The fact that October has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays is not remarkable in the least. Simple math reveals that each year can only start on one of seven calendar days, so that gives us seven possible calendars. Add in leap year every 4 years, and that leaves us with a MAXIMUM of 14 possible calendars.

2. This does not happen only once every 823 years. It is not ten times as rare as Halley’s Comet. It happened in 1999 and 2004. It will happen again in 2021.

3. This is not “money bags.” If you are basing your retirement around this calendar “fact”, you will be sorely disappointed.

4. It is, to put it mildly, extremely unlikely that posting this to your status will have any effect on your finances. The only likely result is that it will make your friends think less of you and your critical thinking skills.

5. This has absolutely nothing to do with Chinese Feng Shui, which is a psuedo-scientific practice that believes that the orientation of a building and/or the furniture in that building will have an effect on prosperity.

6. Once again, don’t worry about posting this for fear of losing money. There is no time limit you have to obey. The universe does not work this way.

This is just a simple “argument from authority” logical fallacy that is resulting in yet another spamming of Facebook. Friends, please do me a great favor. For your Facebook status, put what you are doing, or an interesting TRUE fact. Another favor, if you don’t mind, would be to think about something for at least 10 seconds before accepting it as fact.

Thanks!

Memo to Capitol One: I have lost the plot

October 24th, 2010

I don’t enjoy watching commercials. I am thankful every day for the technology that allows me to record television programs, and, because those programs are recorded, fast forward through the commercials.  Two to three minutes of waiting becomes five to ten seconds, depending on how ‘in-the-zone’ I am when wielding my trusty remote control.

However, I also love NFL football, and most of the time I prefer watching this programming live. But that means that I must endure the commercials. Which brings me back to the beginning of this blog post. I don’t enjoy watching commercials.

One of the reasons I don’t enjoy watching commercials is that they are repetitive. During the average NFL game, one can see the same commercial 5 – 10 times.  That doesn’t seem like a lot, but believe me…it is.  Another reason is that most of the ad campaigns are stupid. I realize that is not very descriptive, but there is no other way to say it. Maybe “insulting to my intelligence” is another way to say that. But “stupid” works fine with me. A third reason is “Geico”. I don’t feel that I need to elaborate on that point.  I have wasted enough of my life watching their commercials. I am not going to waste more of it writing about them.

Not barbarians. Not Vikings. Visigoths.

Duh.

One of my least favorite ad campaigns right now is the Capital One ad featuring their Visigoths. No, they aren’t barbarians. No, they aren’t Vikings. Capital One is very insistent on this point.  So, kudos to them for taking a stand.  I guess.

The reason I hate these ad campaigns is that they have strayed so far from their basic premise that the Visigoths are no longer recognizable, or even necessary.  Remember what the original ad campaign was? I bet you don’t.

The original ad campaign, way back in 2005, was that the Visigoths were a ham-fisted but effective metaphor for the high interest rates charged by other credit card companies. If you had the wrong credit card (i.e., any credit card that was not a Capital One) credit card, high interest rates and fees could strike with the fury of the Visigoths. Or something. I didn’t really get the point back then either.

But the Visigoths are no longer that metaphor. Capital One refuses to free them from their duties, and keeps thrusting them into service in more and more awkward roles. The next, somewhat logical (?) step they took was stating that since so many people were switching to Capital One, the Visigoths had to get new jobs (hot dog vendor, airline steward, shoe salesman, etc.). Har-har-har. Funny, no?  No.  Let me also point out here that, to carry the metaphor forward, the high interest fees and charges have to get new jobs. This is nonsense.

That’s the end of the Visigoths, right? No. Capital One just won’t let them go. The next thing you know, they are holed up in the Capital One Card Lab making their own Capital One card. To me, it is here that the campaign completely goes off the rails.  Remembering the original metaphor, and carrying it forward, now the high interest fees and charges are applying for credit cards. This is not nonsense — this is madness.

The latest commercials have the Visigoths vacationing to different locales and enjoying the benefits of their Capital One credit cards. This is just lazy ad campaigning at its finest. It’s easier to keep using the same “mascots” than to come up with a creative campaign that, oh, I don’t know, makes sense.

I just had to get that out of my system. I feel better now.

Weird but Fun Atari Games Comments

October 13th, 2010

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Arbor Day ’87-’88 Comments

April 30th, 2010

Add your comments to the Arbor Day ’87-’88 article here!

Leave Ronald Alone

April 1st, 2010

I have been a fan of McDonald’s for as long as I can remember.  I can still recall when they first brought out the chicken mcnuggets, and they sold them in a package of six instead of a package of 10.  I fondly remember the old happy meals, the styrofoam containers for the sandwiches, the McDLT, even the old McPizzas they used to make.

But the thing I remember best about McDonalds are the McDonald’s characters I grew up with.  Grimace, the Fry Guys, the Hamburgler, Birdie, the McNugget buddies, and of course, the man in charge, Ronald McDonald.

And so I coooome to yoooou...with ooooopen aaaarms...

And so I coooome to yoooou...with ooooopen aaaarms...

I remember Ronald best from the many commercials that featured him interacting with children, as well as his friends from McDonaldland.  There were some classic commercials, perhaps the most classic would be the commercial that would air in the winter, in which a Ronald McDonald comes to the aid of a small child who has trouble ice skating.  Ronald McDonald swoops in, scoops him up in his red and white striped arms, and not only teaches this child to skate, he almost teaches him to fly.  The joy on the child’s face is unmistakeable, and almost seemed magical to me when I was a child.

Unfortunately, a group of busybodies called Corporate Accountability International wants McDonald’s to retire Ronald McDonald as part of their advertising campaign. 

“For nearly 50 years McDonald’s and its iconic clown Ronald have hooked kids on unhealthy food, spurring a deadly epidemic,” they say.  How ridiculous.  Yes, we have an obesity problem in this country, but it isn’t an epidemic.  For one, ‘epidemic’ is a medical term used for the outbreak of a disease.  What is the pathogen exactly in the obesity ‘epidemic’?  Trans-fats?  Also, the obesity problem in this country is not all Ronald’s fault.  Ronald isn’t driving these kids to the restaurant and shoving the food in their mouth.

Should kids be eating McDonald’s food every day?  Of course not.  But kids aren’t eating there because of the commercials.  They are eating there because parents are taking them there, and because the food is cheap and tasty.

McDonald’s has responded and said that Ronald McDonald is a “beloved brand ambassador” for the fast-food chain. “He is the heart and soul of Ronald McDonald House Charities, which lends a helping hand to families in their time of need, particularly when families need to be near their critically-ill children in hospitals. In fact, 4 million children are helped every year around the world through the Ronald McDonald House Charities.  Ronald also helps deliver messages to families on many important subjects such as safety, literacy, and the importance of physical activity and making balanced food choices.”

The CAI should stop clowning around and focus their efforts on stopping the obesity “epidemic” the only way that is going to work:  stressing the importance of personal accountability.

The End of the Giant Christmas Catalog

December 1st, 2009

As a child, there were many things that I looked forward to concerning Christmas.  Putting up the Christmas Tree, the possibility of snow days that would allow me to stay home and watch daytime television, and egg nog.  Lots of egg nog.  But one of the things that I looked forward to the most during the Christmas Season was the arrival of the twin behemoths of merchandising: the Sears Wish Book, and the JC Penney Catalog.  (The bronze medal goes to the Montgomery Wards catalog, since they are now defunct).

Sure, we would get little catalogs and sales papers from local and chain stores (the fliers from the local store ‘Magic Mart’ were particularly pathetic), but around November, Sears and JC Penney pulled out all the stops with the delivery of two huge catalogs that seemed to cover the entire inventory of their stores.  These things were huge!  If you dropped one on your foot, prepare to be laid up for a week!  I don’t know which catalog I enjoyed more, but I recall in my later years being more fond of the Sears catalog, because of its title ‘wish book’.  This wasn’t a catalog…it was a WISH book.  A modern day magic lamp that could bring you your heart’s desire, so long as you could convince Santa (aka, your parents) to buy what you found in the pages within.  Though to be fair, the Christian in me gets angry, because upon closer study, the book used to be called ‘The Christmas Book’, then ‘The Wish Book for the Christmas Season’, then ‘The Wish Book for the Holiday Season’, then finally, ‘the Wish Book’.  Come on Sears, it’s Christmas!  Embrace it!

These catalogs were absolutely essential when it came to the important yearly task of creating a Christmas list.  My brother and I would take one of the catalogs and spend HOURS pouring over the toy pages in search of our dream gifts for Christmas.  I learned early on that the ‘good stuff’ (i.e., the toys) were located at either end  end of the catalogs.  I would furiously skip the first half of the catalog, filled with boring clothes and housewares, and arrive at the wonderful toy section.  We would glance at the baby and little kid toys, not so much because we wanted any of them, but more a mix of nostalgia and regret that we didn’t have the new cool toddler toys pictured.  Next we’d quickly skip the boring Barbie and little girl section, and get to the best part of the catalog: the ACTION FIGURES.  He-Man and the Masters of the Universe were my #1 seed for years when it came to asking what I wanted for Christmas.  I recall especially enjoying it when the catalog would take the time to put up a large display of action figures, usually around a playset.  This was a very effective advertisement for me, because I instantly wanted everything shown in the picture, and I would update my Christmas list accordingly.

As the weeks went by, I would explore other sections of the catalog out of a mixture of boredom and curiosity.  I remember the electronics section catching my eye, especially the keyboard section.  I always wanted a keyboard, but alas, they were always cost prohibitive because I was also asking for a slew of action figures, and action figures were always going to win that battle.  The ‘tools’ section was an annual bore.  I did enjoy looking at the Christmas trees in the book.  Sometimes I would browse the furniture and bedroom sets and imagine how my home/bedroom could be improved by the addition of some new bedspreads and curtains.  Eventually boredom would take hold, and my brother and I would draw funny captions on the people in the clothing and housewares section.  Yes, this was juvenile and unnecessary, but it was also hilarious, and something that I think I would even enjoy doing today.

UNFORTUNATELY, this year will be my last year to take advantage of this opportunity.  You see, Sears left off putting out their huge catalog in 1993 (after a run of 106 years), due largely to economic necessity.  Now I have learned that JC Penney has announced that they are discontinuing their ‘big book’ catalog.  Reasons for its demise range from the increasing costs of paper and mailing and environmental concerns about wasting paper to the availability of entire collections online versus a few outfits on a catalog page.  I can understand the online argument, but the environmental concerns fall completely flat to me, as this is an obvious cop-out.  In its heyday, the 36-year-old Big Book ranged from 900 to 1,500 pages and surpassed $1 billion in sales in 1979.  Think about that!  A 1500 page catalog!  The possibilities are endless!

“Big book catalogs have become less relevant as customers have embraced shopping online, where they have ready access to our entire assortment at any time on jcp.com,” Mike Boylson, executive vice president and chief marketing officer, said in a release.  Well, Mike, that might be true, but there is something to say for tradition, isn’t there?  What about those little kids who can’t navigate your labyrinthian website, or simply choose not to?  Not everybody has a high speed internet connection , you know.  And besides, I have taken a look at the online version of the Sears Wish Book, and it is decidedly lacking when compared to the original paper version.  For one, it features terrible flash animations, and even worse acting of little kids in front of an obvious green screen.  Second, it is 46 pages long, including the front and back cover.  46 pages?  Really?  I’m less than impressed.  And not every page includes product.  A sorry excuse for a catalog if you ask me, or even if you don’t.  So if you want to experience the joy of flipping through an obnoxiously huge book stuffed cheek to jowl with product, pick up your JC Penney catalog today, before they are gone…FOREVER!

NOOOOOOOO!

November 17th, 2009

As a kid, I was a big fan of The Smurfs.  I’m not saying it was the best Saturday morning cartoon, but I’d put it in the top 10 of those that I watched on Saturday morning when I was growing up.  Maybe top 5.

So I got very nostalgic when I heard that Paramount and Nickelodeon were making a Smurfs CGI film scheduled to come out in 2010.  I was skeptical, because I was concerned about some remakes of other Saturday morning cartoons.  Garfield and The Chipmunks were both pretty much destroyed by the Hollywood ‘hit’ machine, and the last thing I wanted was for the Smurfs to be next on the list.

My fears were allayed somewhat when I saw some of the pre-liminary mock-ups of the CGI effects showing the Smurf Village.  (I’d really prefer it be traditional 2-D animation, but I know that isn’t going to happen.)

Not bad at all!

Not bad at all!

I think I would be happy with the result based on this preview image.  However, based on a rumor posted on Boing Boing blog, my hopes for a good Smurfs film, even a decent Smurfs film, is going up in smoke.

Apparently, someone is working on a live action Smurfs film.  Live action.  Not animated.  Not CGI.  Live action.  That is, with live actors.  This is terrible news for fans of The Smurfs, because I see no way that this will not be a complete and total disaster.  No matter who is cast for these roles, the actors aren’t going to measure up to their animated counterparts.  That is the problem with live-action versions of cartoons.  See The Flintstones for an example  The only exception to this rule would be Scooby Doo, and even then the film-makers had the common sense to make Scooby Doo CGI.

It gets worse.  There is no sugar-coating this news.  Casting rumors?  John Lithgow as Papa Smurf, and Wallace Shawn as Gargamel.  Absolutely garbage choices.  I won’t be seeing this movie.  I won’t be renting this movie.  I pity anyone who ends up watching it.  I took the liberty of putting together some mock-ups of what I think this film will end up looking like.

I can't imagine the real thing looking much better...

I can't imagine the real thing looking much better...

Inconceivable, indeed...

Inconceivable, indeed...

I have no words.  If these rumors are true, this film is going to smurfing smurf.